Bobs on the Tide

Tonight, I was doing a few things on the computer and Ryan turned on some old EFY music to listen to while we hung out in the office. WOW. The music is all stuff I listened to mainly on my mission and it really put me in a state of memory. I think about how I was as a missionary--it was certainly not an easy time of life, (what time of life is easy, really?), but it was an amazing time of my life. I felt so bold and so strong in my testimony of the gospel. I was so focused and ready to work. Now, there are so many distractions in my life that some days I really wonder what happened to that girl from a few years ago.

When I had about two months left in my mission, I was sent back to Riga--where I had been trained. I had left about 10 months earlier and Russian-speaking sisters hadn't served there for about 6 months. AND--I was to train a new sister, too. Within a matter of days, we reorganized apartments, got settled, and we were off. About 3-4 weeks later, another new sister, a native Russian, joined our companionship and I was then training these 2 amazing, but very different sisters. During the 10 months I had been gone, my very first convert, Lena, had left the church, but when I returned she took it upon herself to search me out and tell me everything that was wrong with me and the Church.

By this time, I was pretty used to Russians and I did not sugar coat ANYTHING for them, as they like it all up front. So, I got into a few discussions with Lena. She yelled at me and I boldly stated my testimony back to her. I testified of the apostacy, that the true church of Jesus Christ was restored through Joseph Smith; that God, who still loves His children, has continued to provide prophets on the earth since that time; that the Book of Mormon is true; and most of all, that Jesus Christ lives and guides His church. I remember one evening in particular, she hounded me for a couple of hours, following me around the church building in Centre. By the time I got home that night, I felt truly shaken. In spite of all of the miraculous and amazing experiences of the previous 18 months, (I came home about 10 days short of 19 months), my very first convert had me questioning what I had been doing for that "pohl-terah-godah" (year and a half, in Russian).

Honestly, I feel a more perfect opportunity could not have come to me at that time in my mission. It was my chance to really come to understand whether my efforts were accepted by the Lord and it was a wonderful opportunity to strengthen my own testimony. The next morning, I spent my usual time in the scriptures and in the Missionary Library books. And, by the end of that hour, I didn't have a single doubt in my mind. I knew that my short time of service had been accepted and appreciated by a loving God and a loving Savior. The next time I saw Lena, all I could do was quietly testify and tell her that I loved her and that I knew God and Jesus Christ loved her, too. And, then, I didn't see her again.

Even though that experience was so difficult, I miss it dearly. The great news, though, is that those experiences will always be part of me, not only for now, but forever as well. I think about meeting my people again at the "Ultimate Mission Reunion"--and I honestly look forward to it.

As for the title, that's a joke between me and one of my companions having to do with Russian grandmas and an EFY song. It would take too long to explain it here...but if you really want to know, leave me a comment and I'll explain in another post.